I have to come up with a subject, too?

[brigdh]

Blah, what a day.

It's in the low fifties and it's just a miserable, grey, drippy sort of day. I got an IM from a high school friend, just now thanking me for helping her with her paper a week or so ago. I haven't talked to this girl in months, possibly a year, and yet she felt it was perfectly appropriate to IM me and, without even pretending to have a conversation or asking how I'd been or thanking me, told me to look up references for her so she could write some report on the night before it was due. There are so many reasons why I deliberately cut off contact with most of my high school friends as soon as I entered college, but this is... Well. I can't really say that this is new. This is the latest.

I had to write an email to someone for whom I do care deeply, and yet it's quite likely I will never hear from her again, because of real life problems. And then I noticed that I'd been defriended by someone else, probably because I don't comment on enough of her posts.

I am never going to get the hang of this whole social thing.

Comments

[p-zeitgeist.livejournal.com]

Let's just look at this again, shall we? Some person who doesn't bother to stay in touch with you IMs you out of the blue to demand that you do her academic work for her, and you think you're the one who doesn't get this social thing? Because I'm thinking it's her.

And I'm not just saying that because I like you, while I am predisposed to hate all your high school friends for having voted for George Bush.

But to continue the theme of social phenomena that one doesn't understand: I am never going to understand this whole friending/defriending thing. Especially if you're right about the person you're referring to, because how could anyone possibly comment on everyone else's posts all the time? How are there enough hours in the day? It isn't a matter of affection or desire; it's a matter of physical possibility.

-- But no. I'm not going to think too hard about this. Or the idea that people are keeping track of who comments on their journals, and how regularly, and then defriending some of them based on the scorecard is going to make my head explode.

[wordsofastory.livejournal.com]

Well, see, there you go being all logical. How am I supposed to angst now?

Heh. If it makes you feel any better, most people don't keep track of who comments and who doesn't. Which is such a good thing, because I get shy and won't comment to people's journals for months, despite reading every post. It's kind of an immature thing to do and, for whatever reason, in my experience it seems to be limited to people who also have friends-locked journals. But I know that she does, because she's outright said that she does, and that people who don't keep up get defriended. And I've gone through this exact thing once before with her.

...but right now there is the biggest, brightest rainbow I have ever seen outside, which must be some kind of sign.

[p-zeitgeist.livejournal.com]

How am I supposed to angst now?

Well, you know how I feel about angst. If it's not going to lead to the hot sex, what's even the point?

[wordsofastory.livejournal.com]

Ha! *dies*

[mistressrenet.livejournal.com]

Seconded. On all counts.

[kohakutenshi.livejournal.com]

*noddles*

I agree! I just don't understand this social interaction thing, either.

Though it was funny when a friend of mine from high school, who had later turned on me, IMed me the other day from Classmates and I told her...

Me: "Yeah, I've been really into the anime and manga now. I like shonen-ai or boys-love. It's great."
Her: "Oh, look at that, I have to go pick up my dad at the airport, bye!"

Hasn't IMed me since. >:)

[rachelmanija.livejournal.com]

I think wordsofastory should IM the rude person with the paper with the following message: "I've been really into the anime and manga now. I like shonen-ai or boys-love. It's great." And watch her disappear.

Regarding the defriending, I pare down my friendslist periodically because it's taking up too much of my time, and the usual reason people get removed is not that they don't comment enough on mine, but that our interests have diverged-- their journal has become almost entirely fanfic about knitting, or something.

[kohakutenshi.livejournal.com]

True true, though my friendslist is usually small anyway.

Unless one of them decides to become a self-righteous, hypocritical whiney butt. P.P

*ahem*

Definately would IM the person, but gah, what good would it do? She'd just find someone else and never learn her lesson. *shakes head* People... *shrug*

[wordsofastory.livejournal.com]

*laughs* Yeah, I'm fairly certain that I'd never have to deal with her again if I did that.

And that's the same way I decide who to defriend, and I'm sure that's how most people do it. But as neither of our interests have changed, I'd talked to her fairly recently, and she regularly threatens to defriend anyone who stops commenting, I'm pretty sure I guessed right. Which I suppose is more of an argument of why I shouldn't have even been bothering to try and keep her interest- who keeps tabs on their friends' comments, after all?- than anything else, but it's still sort of depressing.

[rachelmanija.livejournal.com]

she regularly threatens to defriend anyone who stops commenting.

OK, she's officially a doofus.

[weirdquark]

Seconded.

[mistressrenet.livejournal.com]

A lot of times I'll look over and if I can't remember who they were or why I friended them, they're gone. But that's a pretty short list.

[wordsofastory.livejournal.com]

Ha! Well, that's a great way to get rid of someone.

[kohakutenshi.livejournal.com]

And it was totally unintentional, too! XD

I mean, I have to wonder what she wants when she contacts me out of the blue and launches into the whole, "I'm divorced now and oh, I think I may be pregnant."

*shakes head* I can only feel sorry for her because she was sexually molested as a child, but the army wanted her so bad because she was excelling in ROTC and they would have PAID FOR EVERYTHING for her to go to any college she wanted.

And she chose to get married to a guy I warned her about, who ended up beating her. *sigh*

People like that make me so...ARGH!

*glomp* And here I am unloading on YOUR journal. Shoot me now please. XD

[wordsofastory.livejournal.com]

Aw, no worries, honey. Feel free to unload. ^^

Actually, she sounds kind of like the friend I was complaning about (who is also in ROTC, and goes through the stupidest relationships, and almost ended up pregnant...)

[solo.livejournal.com]

It's not you! These people, the one with the paper and the defriending one, sound totally unreal. I know I'd do a happy dance if they vanished from my life forever. I just wish you wouldn't let them get to you. And you actually helped the one with the paper? Has it occurred to you that you might just be far too nice a person?

[wordsofastory.livejournal.com]

Aw, thank you. You're right; it is better to just be grateful that they're gone.

...and, yeah, I did. Though it was something so unbelievably simple she asked of me that I have no idea why she couldn't do it herself- I found the things she needed by spending two minutes on google.