Hmm, yeah, I feel kind of in-between about the controversy, too. Because while I do think no-homophobia worlds come off as a little 'fairy tale -esque', sometimes that's really what I want to read. I'm actually happiest with there existing books of both sorts: the no-homophobia worlds, and the more-realistic worlds (because sci-fi/fantasy books really do seem to divide themselves fairly clearly into one or the other category). Because I like having the choice to read a book of either camp, depending on my mood.

Which is why I mentioned it in the post, really: I tend to feel very clearly on if I'm in a no-homophobia or more-realistic mood, and so when approaching a sci-fi/fantasy book with gay characters, I like to know beforehand which sort I'm getting.